I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
