Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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