Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Rumble strips road head = magical
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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