my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize