Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Randomize
