Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
