when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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