and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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