Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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