i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
