Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
