Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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