So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
