i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
