Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
