I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
