Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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