ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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