so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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