Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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