i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize