So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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