and i looked up. we had an audience...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
