I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
