A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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