so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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