I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
