Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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