I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
