ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
