she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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