I just saw a hot homeless man
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
