someone get that fucking seahorse.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize