If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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