Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
This is classic penis vs brain.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
