your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize