It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
