just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
My vagina just recognized that song.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
