that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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