You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize