Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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