she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
