Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
