that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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