Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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