i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
