so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
