at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
