dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
