i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
