i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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