Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize